30 Days of the Whole(ish)30

Tomorrow marks 30 days without grains or sugar.  I refer to what I'm doing as the Whole30, although I'm doing an altered version of the strict 30-day plan.  One-and-a-half years ago, I did the strict Whole30 and had success, but didn't see myself keeping up that pace for the rest of my life.  After putting on even more weight during 2014, then reading so much about food and how it effects mental wellness, I decided something had to give.

Since I didn't follow the Whole30 Program Rules to the letter, what did I do?  Below, in bold, are the program rules along with my own comments explaining what I have been doing over the past 30 days and how I plan to live from here on out.

Yes: Eat real food.
--> I did this.

No: Avoid for 30 days.

• Do not consume added sugar of any kind, real or artificial.
  --> I used CoffeeMate Naturals in my coffee every morning. I also made just a couple of recipes, such as orange chicken stir-fry, with a little bit of coconut nectar.  I won't hesitate to use maple syrup on my paleo crepes or protein pancakes.
• Do not consume alcohol in any form, not even for cooking.
  --> I didn't consume alcohol. To me, it's not worth the calories/weight gain.
• Do not eat grains.
  --> I followed this to the letter, except for two special occasions. (see below)
• Do not eat legumes.
  --> I followed this until day 29, when I made my corn and bean salad. As long as legumes don't upset my stomach, I'll occasionally include them in my diet.
• Do not eat dairy.
  --> I used the CoffeeMate Naturals every morning and also had yogurt one day. 
• Do not consume carrageenan, MSG or sulfites.
  --> This is pretty easy when you're not eating processed foods.
• Do not try to re-create baked goods, junk foods, or treats* with “approved” ingredients. 
  --> While I didn't re-create baked goods, I did enjoy some "junk foods" with whole ingredients.  See some of my favorites here.  I made sweet potato french fries a few times and snacked on some potato chips (only ones made with only potatoes, oil and salt) on a few occasions.  These convenience foods were very handy when we were on our road trip and while we went camping last week.  While the family enjoys s'mores, it's a lot more fun to be enjoying Go Raw's Super Chocolate Cookies than to have nothing. I also attended a wedding for the first time in years. While there, I enjoyed a very small piece of wedding cake. Eating is social and fun; this is where I've been able to come to a place of balance over the past 30 days.  I much more enjoyed the people, conversations and celebrations than I did the food that happened to be in front of me.

One last and final rule: You are not allowed to step on the scale or take any body measurements for the duration of the program.
-->I did weigh myself, almost every day.  I've found that I don't weigh when I know I'm gaining weight.  Because of the balance I'm finding, I'm able to weigh and not feel like giving up when the numbers don't move.

If you read from the beginning of this blog, you'll see that I've struggled with weight and body issues for 85% of my life.  During my adult life, my weight has ranged from 130 to 215.  Even at my lowest weight, I wasn't satisfied with my body.  I certainly wasn't happy with my priorities during that time.  Looking back on old photos, I can see now that I looked nice, but just always felt like a blob.  This time around, I'm trying to focus on being content and even happy with myself at each turn. I remind myself that my friends have always liked me and been there for me regardless of what the scale says. I'm the only one hating myself for my weight.  The weight needs to come off for my well-being, not for my ego.  Do I feel good about myself when the weight comes off? Yes!  Will I enjoy being thinner?  Yes.  This time around, I'm just not making that the focus.  If you're curious about the numbers, I've lost 12 pounds over the past month. Eight pounds came off during the first 10 days, then 4 more pounds dropped over the next 20.

As with the first time I did the Whole30, I noticed that I haven't obsessed over food. I haven't craved food nor have I over-eaten.  There is certainly something in processed food that makes me want to keep eating it despite being full.  It also seems that sugar fuels my craving for more sugar.  For the past 30 days, food has been fuel and not an addiction.  That is why, on the camping trip, I ate a bite of s'mores and then stopped because I truly didn't want to eat more. In addition, I had no guilt over eating it.  I'm praying this new way my brain works will continue.

Eating like this can be time-consuming.  It can also cost more.  An apple costs more than a box of mac and cheese.  I can buy 2-3 12-oz. bags of Doritos for the price I pay for one 4 oz. Go Raw snack.  An 8-pack of nitrate-free, organic, all-beef hot dogs costs 4 times what "regular" hot dogs cost.  A dozen organic eggs cost about $1.50 more than non-organic.  One pound of organic grass-fed beef costs at least $2.50 more than the usual ground beef.  When you have a family of 7, all of whom enjoy snacking, that adds up to more money and more time in the kitchen.  There are times I feel like I'm constantly chopping, preparing, and cleaning up food.  (A mandolin is my next kitchen purchase!)  While my grocery bill is higher, we have saved no less than $30 per week not eating out or buying sodas and sweet tea, so it all comes out in the wash.

The kids are eating very little sugar and only some grains.  My child who has been struggling with depression has not adopted the Whole30 program yet, but is doing well in that she's reducing sugar and grains.  This kid is totally blowing me out of the water at the gym.  She sometimes goes twice a day to work out or swim, then spends some time in the steam room, hot tub and shower.  Lifetime Fitness has been a great coping technique for this child. I'm proud of her.

To further update you about her, she's currently off all psych/mood medications. As her psychiatrist stated, she'd like to get to know my child "without the muddy waters."  The combination of getting off her meds plus quitting all the grains and sugar "cold turkey" was overwhelming.  My child felt she didn't have any control over her own body and choices.  Therefore, she's making changes on her own timeline.   Even with the positive changes she's making, her weight continues to go up.  We are in the process of getting a referral to an endocrinologist to see if her thyroid is wreaking havoc on her body.  That poor girl!  Her body suffers so much.  Her mind is still giving her a lot of trouble, too, but she's been coping.  I'm ready for her body and mind to give her a break and support the amazing person she is instead of weighing her down and holding her back.  As always, your prayers are coveted!

In my next post, I'll share a bit about how I'm feeling different since adopting this way of eating.